No! You Should Not Do Whatever Makes You Happy

This day and age, it is so cliche to say that a person should do whatever makes them happy. You hear it everyday from almost every medium and it is starting to drive me crazy. It is driving me crazy because I think it is a categorically false statement. Even worse than this are the people who say why can't you just be happy for me. All of these statements are well intended. After all, we all can and should strive to be happy. This post is not about wanting people to be miserable. Quite the contrary. My family wants to bring joy to your life and we in no ways want to cause pain. That being said, the statements about happiness I am frustrated with are just messages that should cease to exist. After reading this, I hope that you will agree with me.

The main reason those statements are false is that they seem to be an excuse for whatever bad decisions a person wishes to make. I actually had a person insult my entire family, tell me I didn't know what I was doing as a parent and then still say "why can't you just be happy for me." I'm sorry, but if my family is treated poorly I cannot just be happy for you and support how you are treating us. I can be happy that you found happiness, but I cannot accept your behavior or agree with it because it makes you happy. To be more specific, I will bring up several examples of times where the right thing trumps being happy. I will also include instances that people think will make them happy that actually brings them a great deal of pain.

Obviously, a mentally disturbed person wanting to kill a person claiming "why can't you just be happy for me" seems outrageously absurd. However, I am sure there are actually people like this. Some people claim that they want to kill their boss, a cheating spouse, some other person that has wronged them. They just want their revenge and want someone gone. While most of us can't fathom this behavior or thinking, it happens. Just being happy cannot and will not ever be an excuse for this. Sure, this is an extreme example, but it goes to show the idiocy of the statement. There are plenty of other instances in which the just be happy mantra fails...

To go along further with the law, let's talk about stealing. If someone has something that you want, you cannot just take it from them. If you take something from someone or force them to share that is theft. Theft is a crime and it is wrong. You can want it, taking it may make you happy, but you just cannot do it. Stealing is wrong and it doesn't matter if said item will make you happy, it just can't be done. Sure, major crimes like murder, theft, rape, and battery might be extreme examples, but they just show the issues with the original statement. The just be happy for me movement uses this phrase as a means to justify their horrible decisions and it is just wrong. It doesn't have to be a major crime either....

Not taking responsibility for your kids so you can be "happy" is wrong. Never taking care of them and caring more about yourself than your kids is not okay. You see when you have kids your focus needs to shift to helping them become positive hardworking citizens as adults. It needs to shift towards their happiness. Neglecting them and going out partying every night is not doing that. Cheating on your spouse is not doing that. God forbid it doesn't work out with your partner don't completely shut the kids out. They are still your kids. It is not your kids fault. You must always remember your kids. Forgetting about them will ultimately leave you feeling empty inside. The kids are your responsibility from conception until natural death.

Notice how I said from conception. It is important to know that your rights end where mine begin. Well the unborn baby has rights too. They might not have entered the world, but they are living beings. They have heartbeats. The fetus is still our responsibility as parents. Intentionally ending their life or any life is wrong. Abortion is wrong. Your future and your happiness are not a means to end that life. Ending that life will make you feel a whole lot worse than you do currently. While the baby will bring you joy. The decision to end an innocent person's life is not a burden you want to carry and not a choice any person should ever want to make.

To go further, most of us would rather spend time with our families and could find something more enjoyable than work. I quite like my job, but it doesn't compare to family time for me. However, none of us can just skip work everyday in order to chase our happiness of being with family all day or doing other things that will make us happier. We have to have responsibility. We have to pay the bills. We have to do what is right which isn't always what will make us happiest.

Now, we should still aim to be happy. You cannot go through life feeling miserable and alone. Every person has the right to be happy. I do not disagree. My argument is that your happiness should not come at the expense of someone else. Your happiness needs to come from finding a job you are passionate in and being a great person along the way. Being a Godly person. Everything in this world is fleeting and you will only want more and more. By that I mean that everything on Earth is finite, so it is difficult to put everything into finite things. The only thing that is infinite is God. You have to give it up to God for true eternal happiness.

So, I will never say "do what makes you happy" if someone asks me for advice. Instead, I will say, find some line of work that you can do and live comfortable on, treat others the way you want to be treated, and try to be the best at everything you do. I also aim to be a positive example of God's love and tell people about God when they seek it out of me. Hopefully, others will know I am Christian by how I act and conduct myself and more and more people will come into the church to seek that eternal happiness. "For they will know we are Christians by our love." Love others, trust God, respect life, respect law, and then you will be happy. Don't just blindly chase happiness, because what you want isn't always what you need.

-Noland

That Time We Had A Lazy Weekend...

Typically our family is go-go-go. We like to have fun and spend lots of family time at least every weekend. Whether it be a trip to the zoo, Disney, or something else, we like these crazy outings. However, this weekend we have just wanted time to ourselves, time to unwind, and time to RELAX. With my team's track season ending this seemed to be the weekend to do it and just lay around doing nothing just like the Bruno Mars song...Lazy Song

Now, we did not just do nothing all weekend and lay in our PJs. My family still went to church, still went to get groceries, and made a stop at the Catholic Store in Tampa. However, we didn't have some all day event and just chose to stay home for this one weekend. Sometimes, we all need these kinds of weekends. Sometimes, we just need to recharge our batteries and that is what my family has done this weekend. It is important to have these types of weekends from time to time especially with a lovely pregnant wife who can use the rest.

This weekend is also just another chance to reflect and realize how blessed we are. I am blessed. My family is blessed and you are blessed. We are blessed with life, with nature, with wonderful people. Sometimes it seems like some of us are more blessed than others. Circumstances dictate that we all have different challenges and obstacles, but it's how we embrace them that dictates how things will go. It is taking the time to recharge and reflect that we are able to really put things into perspective. These are the moments that allow us to be thankful. To appreciate the times and the people in our life that make them so great. I thank God for all the things that he has put in my life and embrace the challenges that the future brings. Judging by our past, the future for my family looks bright. Trusting in God and his plan will make it all the brighter.

In the future weekends, I will try my best to remember this reflection and try to embrace everything. It is important to stay on the positive train and look at opportunities for the potential happiness that they possess. One quote I remembered this weekend that I absolutely love is from the original first lady Martha Washington...

"The greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not our circumstances." -Martha Washington

Of course sometimes its easy to keep a positive disposition especially with this little guy around....

Try to keep that positive disposition at all times. It is near impossible with the business of life, but just remember. There is someone somewhere that unconditionally loves you as well. Try to remember these people. If you cannot believe that, you can hopefully believe that Jesus is always there for you and will always love you no matter what. Happy Holy Week people!

-Noland

Saturday Christmas Fun

Today I planned a Christmas Saturday for Noland and I. We relaxed throughout most of the morning but after lunch we went to Robert's Christmas Wonderland in Clearwater, FL. It was pretty magical. I would highly recommend going there if you ever visit the Tampa area. I was the creepy blogger girl who kept taking pictures in the store because I wanted to share the experience with you..yes.

They had a ton of figurines and funky creatures such as these Zim elves..
and villages too.. but I didn't get many pics of those.

These are some yard display figures for sale.

Yes, there was this crazy lighted path as you walked between the two rooms. It looked cooler in person.

Here we are trying on some crazy glasses they had for sale... Noland is Irish- so he tried on the shamrocks..

Also, Noley got a haircut. he's looking like a lil hottie huh? I know, I'm blessed.

I couldn't even capture this on picture. but they had icicle lights hanging from the ceiling. it was like a winter wonderland in this room.

They had every kind of tree you could think of from a Buccaneers tree to Asian tree to an Irish tree, Disney Tree, Beach tree, Palm tree decorated.. It was just simply awesome! 

& Santa was there.. or should I say.. many Santas.

& my personal favorite.. the Nativity scenes

i loveee this.

& this was beautiful too.. 

In the midst of all the Christmas shopping today, it was awesome that I kept being reminded that

"Jesus is the reason for the season" 

After we went to the Christmas store.. Noland & I went to Reconciliation (We're Catholic) & then mass. It was awesome... Our priest told us that in all the hustle and bustle of this season or even just life sometimes its good to stop and be thankful for every interaction and reminder of Christ in our daily lives.. 

After church, Noland & I went down to Pier 60, they were showing the Grinch for free on the beach on one of those inflatable screens. Then we went Christmas light looking on the way back to my place.. 

One of the houses we saw was awesome, it has a beautiful nativity scene and:

None of the other Christmas lights pictures tuned out.. sorry, I need a new camera! :]

but I just thought it was beautiful. I love all the Santa and reindeer and other representations of Christmas but most of all, it is good to stop and prepare our hearts for the coming of Christ at Christmas.

& don't be a Grinch ;) [watched the Grinch today so I just thought I should say that] 

Let me know you stopped by & Thanks!

xoxo Jen.

Over @ Girl With Curls!

Hey Everyone! 

I'm sharing 10 Simple Things that make me Happy! 

over at Girl with Curls!

Jess' blog is super cute! & I'm beyond thankful that I was able to share over there! She also lives in Australia... so its already Wednesday there... Crazy! So go check it out!

& Thanks for stoppin by,

xoxo Jen.

First of Many to Come {GIVE AWAY closed}

Hey Everyone! I was going to wait until tomorrow but I just couldn't handle it. I'm too excited for this giveaway-- because its the first of many to come! yay!
And today is a day to celebrate because I just hit 60 followers! Yay!
So here goes!

So Jasmine from Sparrow Nest Designs 

is offering to give away this beautiful ring.. 

I've featured Sparrow Nest Designs on here before

She has some really great jewelry.. Check out her stuff here & here are a few of my favorites:

Cassidy Yellow Gift Set (Ring & Earrings)

The Hopeless Romantic Necklace

Elegant Mint Lotus Necklace

Hannah Hair Pin Trio

Love Necklace in Brass

How to Enter this giveaway:

You can enter up to three times... Here's how:

1. Click FOLLOW on the left side of the page

Leave a comment on this post and let me know you are following

2. Click [LIKE] on the Its just called Spicy Facebook page on the right column of the blog, 

Leave a comment on this post and let me know you like my Facebook page

3. Go to Sparrow Nest Designs here, 

Leave a comment on this post letting me know your favorite item

The winner will be determined by True Random Number Generator the day before Thanksgiving.. So check back on November 23 to see who won!

Thanks for stoppin' by:

xoxo Jen.

Linkin up with some great blogs:

Cherished Bliss

Vintage Wannabe

Sugar Bee Crafts

The Kurtz Korner

The Importance of Thank You.

(pinned here)

First of all, I must say THANK YOU to all the visitors of my blog as well as all of my new and old followers! I've only been blogging since early August and I have followers.. this is so awesome and I feel so loved! 

I had my first bridal shower this weekend and school has been busy so I'm so sorry I have not updated. I hate when things get so busy that I avoid the blog.. It can be something that you put off and put off until finally I say to myself, "Jenna, get with the program and update!"

Anyways, when it comes to the Bridal Shower.. I will have pictures to share as soon as my photographer edits them.. Check out her beautiful site.. mariannegreig.com!

On a different note, I feel like we can never say "Thank You" enough. I saw this print on Pinterest that really resonated with me so here it is: 

Gosh, I need to be more thankful to God for all the gifts in my life... and thank him on a more regular basis... and on that same note, I have a ton of thank-you cards to write from my awesome bridal shower this weekend! My mom found this great website that helps in writing thank-you cards here!

I am totally going to be using those tips.. 

Now-a-days people don't really write thank-you notes! I feel that they are so important. I will continue to do so and teach my future kids to do the same. Letting others know how thankful you are is so important and it helps you to look at each day in a positive way. 

I am so thankful for my awesome sweet baby fiance (Noland), my mom, my family, my soon-to-be family, my friends (new & old) and just the gift of life! Just some personal reflections on being thankful! I'll post a good ole' craft tomorrow!

& just because they are cute.. here are 2 pictures of my nephews at their b-day party this past weekend:

Oh... & Thanks for stoppin' by!

xoxo Jen.

Thank God for Grandparents

Today I'm going to a different kind of blog post than the typical DIY craft or recipe. This is more personal. I wish I was an eloquent writer then I could describe what I want to say in the best way. 

Mother Teresa rejoicing in the gift of life of a beautiful baby.

Life is so precious. Every day is a gift. Enjoy each day and live it to the fullest because you may not have tomorrow. I say this not as some little cutesy saying but as a fact. 

Yesterday my grandfather's cousin and best friend passed away. I saw him about a month ago when he came to visit our family. It is just so weird and difficult to grasp that now he's gone but this I know... 

God has a plan for each of us... and all plans begin and end in His time.

Although that can be difficult to grasp at times, I trust in the Lord. For he knows far better than I what is best for you and me.

On a different note I wanted to do a little ode to my grandpa and say...

Thank God for Grandparents

Not everyone has them. Those of us who are blessed with grandparents, even if its for a short time should take pleasure in their company and give thanks for the opportunity to know and love them. My grandma passed when I was in third grade and my grandpa moved near us soon after. I'm so thankful that he has been a part of my life growing up and blessed to know such a good man. He is one of the kindest people I know and would give you the shirt off his back. That's why I wanted to do a little tribute to him today saying Thank God for Grandparents. I just love spending time with him and hearing about his life when he was my age.

Just thinking of him today as he copes with the loss of his cousin and friend-- wishing I could be there to play cards with him and cheer him up.

here's me, my brother and grandpa playing cards around the holidays. He taught us card games since we were little.

mom, bro, me and grandpa (making a silly face)

xoxo Jen.

PS. Linking up here today: 

9-11. Where were you?

Where were you on that September day?

I was in 8th grade at St. Johns Catholic School. I'll never forget because I was in Algebra 1 class when the announcements were made to us. I didn't really even know what the World Trade Center was-- which is horrible, I know. Our church had adoration available for the first time in years for people to come pray for our country. The whole school went for some time through out the day. 

After school, I wen to my grandpa's and watched the news the rest of the night on TV to see what was going on in New York. The images will never disappear from my memories.

Years later, my junior year of high school, I was able to visit the site of 9-11. It was so quiet and so empty. I was shocked at the massive structures that were missing, even though I never had seen them when they were there. The lot was so empty and just a large hole with subways still running through it. I teared up at I looked at the spot where two of the largest buildings ever once stood. The whole place just makes you want stop, be quiet and thank God for the gift of life- each and every day. 

I know there has been debate about a Mosque being built.. whether we were supposed to go to war in Afghanistan/Iraq and all the drama.. but today of all days, its NOT about that.. Its about being American and loving our country. We are so blessed. We are free and are able to make our own choices: get an education if we choose, work where we want, marry who we want, go to church where we want and so much more...or not do any of those things..  

This song just sums up how I feel! Gosh, I'm so proud to be an American!

I feel like today we all need to stop and remember even if you are just reading this. I know. Its all over the news and sometimes we just want to forget but we can't. We have to remember all of those who sacrificed their lives for us and so many others.

Today, I want to say Thank you. Thank you to the troops and all those who fight and work for our safety: police, firemen & women, EMTs, and certainly, our soldiers: all military. Most of All, Thank you God for allowing to live free in such a wonderful country and pouring your graces upon us daily.

Praying for all of you who lost family, friends and acquaintances on that difficult day,

xoxo Jen.

Sleeping Beauty

This movie is a childhood classic, although I watch it now, and its so not as good as Beauty & the Beast!

Do you ever have a hard time waking up? Or are you a morning person? 

Well I am a night owl.. As a child and teen, my mom and friends would nickname me "Sleeping Beauty" haha.

here's me asleep as a youngin.

Anyways, as I've become older, I have become a lot better at waking up on time. Through out most of college, I struggled severely with oversleeping and missing or being late to class. I've been tested in sleep studies and everything.. & I'm perfectly healthy.

I've learned so much.. here are a few things that help me to wake up early:

1. Go to sleep at a decent time. That means by 10pm or 11pm, I should be headin' to bed. I haven't seen midnight in a while-- its what I have to do. If one of my favorite show comes on at 10pm (Rookie Blue)-- I have to brush my teeth and get ready for bed on the commercials so that as soon as its over-- Bed time. 11pm is late for me.. Usually I try to be in bed by 10:30pm so that I can be awake at 7:00am the next morning. That gives me 30 minutes to get to sleep and 8 hours of refreshing sleepy goodness.

2. Keep to a strict schedule. If I have to wake up at 7am during the week, I try to wake up at 7am on the weekends too. The more you keep to a schedule, your body becomes accustomed to waking up at 7am and you might not even need an alarm clock eventually.

3. No Napping during the day. NO NAPPING. I find this difficult when I lack a busy schedule on some days.. The key is to stay busy. If you take a nap, take a 20minute nap and no longer than that.. 

4. Exercise. It really helps with sleeping issues. I need to do this more often because it really does make a difference for me. 

5. No eating before bedtime. I always drink water.. but if you eat it should be at least an hour or more before sleep time.

6.No stimulating activity before bedtime. For me, this means not even a shower before bed. I have to shower right after dinner because showers wake me up. If I shower at 10pm before I go to bed, I become super awake. That may not be the case for you but its just something to keep in mind and pay attention to for yourself. Some people like showering in the morning.. that might help too.. but I shower at night.. just not right before bed.

Here is a great song to listen to before bed.. Lullaby by Priscilla Ahn. Btw, I love this song! The video is kinda weird.. but good song!

Hope this post helps those of you tired night wanderers like me get some Sweet Dreams!

And remember:

There is always someone who dreams of your smile and finds in your presence that life is worthwhile. so whenever you're lonely, remember it's true that someone, somewhere is thinking of you.

His name is Jesus.

Love, Jen

Linkin' here: